It's that time of the year again!
Man. Folks are so excited around here it's almost palpable! There's an electric feeling that hits everybody this time of the year, and it's kind of inspiring how the whole nation just kind of catches fire with the anticipation! I know it's not even necessary to mention it, really, but I'm gonna blog about it anywa--
What? I-- You're kidding, right? No. No, I'm not talking about your, your Wonder Bowl or your Super Game or whatever it is you kids are calling it this year. For Pete's sake! And by the way? Say what you want about American football, but it's kinda funny to me how some of the most fiercely heteronormative guys I know get all worked up to see a bunch of muscley, sweaty men in crazy-tight pants slam into each other repeatedly with a huge helping of buttocks slapping for the after show.* I'm just sayin'.
But it's not that. No.
I'm talking about Goopher Day's Eve, when Ralph the Grumpy Green Goopher loads up bags of goodies into his 1989 Ford Festiva and drives about, delivering them to all the boys and girls around the land** who didn't vote for anyone from the Dialectical Materialist party***. Which, y'know, usually covers a good deal of folks.
Um.
Anyway, I'm about to wander off to perform my own Goopher Day's Eve duties, but I thought I'd share this year's card with all who'd care to see it. (Which, I realize is pretty silly, because, hey! Who doesn't get a Goopher Day card, right? See? Silly.)
What? I-- You're kidding, right? No. No, I'm not talking about your, your Wonder Bowl or your Super Game or whatever it is you kids are calling it this year. For Pete's sake! And by the way? Say what you want about American football, but it's kinda funny to me how some of the most fiercely heteronormative guys I know get all worked up to see a bunch of muscley, sweaty men in crazy-tight pants slam into each other repeatedly with a huge helping of buttocks slapping for the after show.* I'm just sayin'.
But it's not that. No.
I'm talking about Goopher Day's Eve, when Ralph the Grumpy Green Goopher loads up bags of goodies into his 1989 Ford Festiva and drives about, delivering them to all the boys and girls around the land** who didn't vote for anyone from the Dialectical Materialist party***. Which, y'know, usually covers a good deal of folks.
Um.
Anyway, I'm about to wander off to perform my own Goopher Day's Eve duties, but I thought I'd share this year's card with all who'd care to see it. (Which, I realize is pretty silly, because, hey! Who doesn't get a Goopher Day card, right? See? Silly.)
The clever inscription inside the card reads: "Meh. I guess it's not that bad. Last year the Micronauts threw a three-day kegger inside my mini-fridge." Hilarious!
* Fine. Yes, I'm bitter, okay? Ultimate Frisbee and my American Floobie-Noobie League never really took off, and, frankly? I blame American football.
** "Around the land" usually encompases about a 40 mile radius, realtively centered on the Goopher's current location. Hey, we can't all have Santa's budget.
*** I have tried several times to get the Goopher to take a more apolitical stance, but he, as are most goophers, is staunchly anti-neo-marxist. Go figure.
posted by Goshzilla | 3:49 PM
2 Comments:
MARK ART! That looks good. But, hot dang if you did not put me in stitches you would have at the very least killed me.
*sigh*
You funny.
wait...what?
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